Today’s Prosperity Process

Our subconscious minds cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image. What we continually think about eventually will manifest in our lives.” ~Robert Collier

Many years ago, my close friend Tariq took me to Sedona, Arizona for the first time. Thanks to his generosity, I was able to experience the beautiful red rocks I’d only seen in photos, awe-inspiring hikes, energy vortexes and the coolest, most evolved people I’d ever encountered. It was long before Sedona became a tourist attraction; many of the roads were still lined with red clay and there wasn’t a pink jeep tour in sight. 

Through the years, I’ve returned to Sedona and Phoenix several times and it has always been an adventure. From Wayne Gretzky asking me to snap some photos of him and friends in the Coyotes dressing room to time literally stopping for hours on a hike through Oak Creek Canyon, the trips have always involved an essence of the surreal. The other common denominator between my Arizonian adventures was that I wished my mom was there…okay, maybe not literally in the Coyotes dressing room, but on the trips in general. 

This was partly due to my suspicion that she’d love the southwest, which she had never experienced, but it was also because we almost moved there. When I was in high school, my dad was offered a promotion/transfer to Phoenix, which he considered but eventually declined. Each time I’m in the area, I wonder what life would have been like had we moved. I always feel close with my dad’s spirit in Phoenix and imagined my mom might also. When I was last in Sedona in 2011, I vowed next time I returned, I would bring her.

I put photos of Sedona in my mind movie, with the affirmation, “I’m so excited I can afford to take Mom to Arizona this year!” I spent time considering which hotels and restaurants she would like best and researched low impact hiking options. I did visualization techniques and started talking with her about going this autumn, even when that seemed like a monetary impossibility. At first, she was like “Yeah right.” After a while, she stopped protesting and began to humor me.

In early October, I was overjoyed to board the flight to Phoenix with my mom. My treat! This was the first time in many years I was taking a trip that wasn’t paid for by someone else, and the first time since college I was paying for a vacation with actual cash. I was overcome with emotion that this had actually become possible. A year ago, I could barely pay my rent! Now I was treating the woman who kept me afloat back when I couldn’t afford to buy myself a cup of coffee to a nice vacation. I was determined to say thank you by saying no thank you as often as she offered me money toward the trip. It was time for her to learn to receive, and for me to return to my true nature as a giver.

As I set off to enjoy the present, the voice of the past, which still subscribes to scarcity, attempted to generate some future-based fear. “Couldn’t you have stayed in cheaper hotels?” it scolded. “You don’t have a client paying for this trip, remember? In fact, why are you taking this trip at all? This is money you should be doing more responsible things with, or in the very least saving for a rainy day!”

The voice lectured me until it lost its voice. I just witnessed it, watching the thoughts come and go, so as not to get hooked into the fear.

We were en route to Arizona; it was pointless to contemplate how much money I was spending or what I “should” be spending it on instead. So I promised myself I would enjoy every minute and look for opportunities to bask in prosperity thinking.

My mom fell in love with the desert and the trip was worth every penny long before our first sight of the red rocks. As I drove closer to Sedona, I watched the expression on my mom’s face, excited to be experiencing that newness again through someone else’s eyes. Not that I need to: I cry every time I make that drive, completely awestruck by the magnificent beauty. My mom described the experience like landing on another planet.  

When we arrived at The Penrose, I was welcomed by the surprising sight of Bell Rock. I recalled driving to Bell Rock last year and thinking how nice it would be to stay in that area, instead of the ever-increasingly busy town. The Penrose is in a quiet area, nestled into the magical rocks and while Tariq had taken me there on our second trip to Sedona, I’d forgotten how amazing the location was. It probably didn’t stand out as much then, since Sedona was still not the tourist attraction it has since become.

I’d also forgotten the layout of their largest room. It was not a “suite” as I’d remembered. I don’t require much sleep in Sedona, due to the heightened energy of the environment, and I didn’t want to keep my mom up past her bedtime or wake her while getting ready for my sunrise hikes. The Penrose offered me an additional room at a rate of $50 per night based on availability. Since no one else came to claim it, it was mine for the remainder of the trip at this incredibly discounted rate.  I felt like I’d won a lottery jackpot.

I immensely enjoyed our stay at the lovely Penrose, starting with delicious outdoor breakfasts next to breathtakingly beautiful backdrops and ending with tea and scrumptious snacks on the terrace as we looked at thousands of stars.   

Of all the wonderful places I’ve been blessed to travel to and stay at, The Penrose is an all-time favorite.  I can’t say enough about owners Whitney and Christie who make you feel like beloved members of their family.  They treated my mom like a rock star and I will forever be grateful for the smile they kept on my mom’s face throughout our stay.

Since my last post, I have truly learned to see that money is only the value we assign to it. To see my mom as happy and relaxed as she was in Sedona was worth its weight in gold, and then some.  

I will return soon with more about our trip and the powerful lessons in prosperity I encountered on it and upon our return. In the meantime, I leave you with this:

Today’s Prosperity Process

If you could take one person in your life anywhere in the world, who would it be and where would you go? Why? If it’s somewhere you’ve been, imagine yourself there again, experiencing the sights and sounds and aromas, basking in your loved one’s excitement and appreciation. If it is somewhere you’ve dreamed of going but haven’t yet visited, do some research online and plan your trip. Don’t limit yourself with prices; find the places that most appeal to you! Pretend you have unlimited resources to take this trip and that the money can only be spent on this vacation; you can’t use it for anything else. Where will you stay? What restaurants will you dine at? What activities will you engage in?

Have fun with this.  I look forward to seeing who the first person will be that will write to me and say, “Nancy you won’t believe this! I did that exercise you suggested in October just for fun…and now I’m on my way to my dream destination!”

Today’s Prosperity Process

 “Money is only the value we assign it,” my cousin Victoria said to my voicemail this morning, a reminder of all I’ve learned this weekend. Her timely words, combined with ideas recently planted in a prosperity workshop with Michael Beckwith, helped me contemplate this crucial aspect of abundance thinking. How we choose to feel about the money we send out is far more important than the dollar amount.

If we view the transaction as “spending,” or are in any way unhappy about having to “shell out” the money for something, it is used, forever gone. If we instead focus on the services we have or are about to receive with gratitude, and the lives and communities the money will better, we are engaging in the energy of circulation. Spending repels prosperity but circulation invites the money back in our direction.

On Thursday, I paid a $135 ticket for my mom’s overdue inspection. Since she’d received the ticket after a thankfully minor accident in my community, she had to go to court here to fight it, rather than just mail in proof she got her car inspected the next day. I realized when I offered to help that I would either pay for the ticket with time or money, the latter of which seemed like the better choice on a beautiful late summer day. It wasn’t a popular decision in my family; they would have preferred the two of us to spend our day in a crowded court room, waiting to see the judge. Since the ticket would have been waived, they viewed my paying it a waste of money. I looked at it from a different perspective.

Paying it was an opportunity to say thank you to someone who has been beyond generous with me through the years, a person without whom I would have been homeless when I was struggling. It was a chance to let her know someone had her back. Learn how to receive Mom; this is only the beginning. She protested, but I wouldn’t take a dime from her. This is how it’s going to be from now on. Get used to it.

The court clerk heard our conversation and was touched; she told me she never knew her mother. The three of us shared a poignant conversation, once which brought tears to all our eyes, and my gratitude for my mom was taken to an even higher level. We enjoyed the rest of the day together, enjoying one another’s company at my pool before I took her back home.

“It doesn’t sound like you spent money on a ticket,” Victoria later commented, “But rather that you  purchased a ticket to a beautiful day with your mother!”

The very next evening, I was going to go out on my brother in law’s boat, something I normally LOVE to do, but my body and spirit were begging for a night in. I do not like to cancel at the last minute, especially when I know people who were counting on me to go for various reasons will be disappointed. I needed to get to the bank before it closed so I made my phone calls en route, letting each person involved know individually that I wasn’t going, providing honest but nevertheless excuses for my decision when all I needed to say was that it wasn’t the right night for me. I faced some expected disappointment (because I expected it), which I did my best to contend with, forgetting it wasn’t my work.

Since I was so preoccupied with everyone else’s feelings, a bad habit I gave up years ago that comes back whenever I’m not practicing sufficient self care, I wasn’t paying full attention to what I was doing. I failed to notice I had parked in a handicapped spot. Granted, the signs were a little confusing, but if I hadn’t been preoccupied with my family and the complete non-crises that I was treating like one, it would have been clear as day.

I noticed the police car pulling up to mine as I walked back down the block toward my car, five minutes after I left it. Before I even got there, I knew what I had done. I could feel the police officer’s agitated energy as she got out of her car. I pleaded with her not to give me a ticket, informing her it had been a legitimate mistake. My ego was triggered more than a little when she ignored my plea and began to plug my information into her system. It was clear she didn’t believe me; she incorrectly assumed I thought I was who I was, that I did things like this all the time, intentionally.

“If I don’t give you the ticket, you’ll do it again tomorrow,” she said with an attitude that clearly demonstrated her dislike for the person she thought I was. I started to argue with her, exactly what she wanted, hissing some comment about karma and the stressful phone call which had preoccupied me, before I caught myself full madness.

Had I honestly just said I was engaged in a stressful conversation that distracted me? The conversation was about whether or not I was going out on a boat. The sad part is I actually had been stressed out! I hate disappointing people. But the truth is, you can never disappoint others; their disappointment is always created by their perception of your actions, not your actual actions. Sometimes I forget this, especially when it comes to family, where these people pleasing habits originated.

Also, was I seriously getting in a power struggle here with a complete stranger? Because she was doing her job? Sure, she could have chosen to cut me a break, but she hadn’t. I know better than to paddle furiously against the current. Maybe this woman made some judgements about me because of how I looked or my car. Maybe she was having a bad day.  Maybe she was really just this rigid and didn’t know how to change her mind once she’d made a decision. Maybe she didn’t know how to give people second chances. What difference did it make? None of that had anything to do with me. Suddenly, all I felt for her was deep compassion.

“Next time you make a mistake, I hope someone is more forgiving with you then you have been with me,” I told her. “That said, I respect you and know you are doing your job. I choose to be okay with this situation and I have no hard feelings toward you. In fact, I’m going to pray that you may experience a greater level of peace. Have a nice evening.”

She was getting back in her car as I said that last bit, but she got back out and told me I could appear in court; maybe they would lower the fee. Suddenly, she was really nice. It was like a switch had gone off; my seeing the situation as it really was allowed her to also. I was not who she thought I was. I was not her enemy. In that instant, she probably even knew it really had been an innocent mistake on my behalf.

My ego got the better of me again as I drove away, as it pondered the perceived unfairness of it all. Here I was, trying to make sure no one in my family felt bad, and I got punished for it with a $200 ticket.  I had spent hours on the phone coordinating a night I was not even going to be part of when I should have spent that time recharging. And now this!  

Again, I heard the nonsense my small mind was trying to sell and declined its offer. I made the choice to spend my day as I had. I could have told everyone else to make a plan, let me know what it was and decided in the moment whether or not it felt right. And I could have put my own needs before the feelings of others, which I couldn’t control in the first place!

I was laughing by the time I told Victoria the story. Twenty minutes ago, it was not a comical one; now it was uproariously funny. I detailed the family dynamics, which as my cousin, she was able to fully appreciate.

“The Codepedency Express came to town. I boarded. With a first class ticket.”

I detailed the story in grander fashion than I’m doing here, since she is my cousin and could appreciate the various plotlines that played out in the tale. I concluded my story with the fact that I am not going to fight this ticket. Yes, just showing up in court would almost guarantee at least a reduction and the street signs are confusing in this community. I once had a bus stop ticket entirely waived for this very reason.

But, I’m not carrying this energy for the next month. I made this mistake because I was putting the entire world before myself and because I wasn’t present. I deserved the ticket. I have the money to pay for it. $200 is nothing considering the amount of money I can manifest if I get the many lessons this incident contained.

“We’ve spent way more than that on personal growth workshops,” Victoria reminded me. 

Very true. As I contemplate this further, I think about how good it feels to have this money in my account, to circulate. The time I fought the bus stop ticket, it was because I didn’t. I think about how cool it was that I didn’t just see the insanity of the power struggle with the police officer in retrospect, but while it was occurring, in time to turn it around. I take time to appreciate the fact that my body is fully functioning and that I don’t need a handicapped spot. I think about the fact that the money will go to the community I live in and better it in some way.

I decided I will include a thank you note with my payment.

“Thank you for this ticket and the ensuing lesson in being fully present, not only when I’m operating a motor vehicle, which is of particular importance, but in every situation. This ticket has not only been a great reminder of this, but has also taught me other lessons. Say no when I mean no, even if I’m being persuaded by people I love to say yes. Don’t give excuses. Remember that other people’s feelings are caused by their perception of what I say and do, not what I say and do. Practice better self care. When I forget to take care of myself, I can’t be of any true service to anyone else, and I exhaust myself further while trying.”

I feel good about sending the money; this is circulation, not spending. This is a choice, to pay this rather than fight it, and it’s a reminder make better choices in the future.

Shortly after making my decision, I received an email from a hotel I booked several weeks ago for an upcoming trip to Sedona, a continuation of my living thank you note to Mom. Suddenly and for no apparent reason, this bed and breakfast felt compelled to give me $10 off the nightly rate because I’ve been there before. Sweet! I decided to look for further evidence that the $200 ticket payment would return to me quickly. The next day, I received a coupon from my yoga studio which will result in a $25 discount. I can’t wait to see how the rest, and more, will show up!

Today’s Prosperity Process

Make choices that feel good to you when you circulate money. And when you can’t change the choice, change your thoughts around it. 

Thank institutions that have loaned you money in advance when you write checks, instead of grumbling about mortgage, loan and credit card payments. Write words of gratitude on the check or on a separate note. It may sound absurd; do it anyway! Take a few moments to appreciate your home when you pay your mortgage or rent, your car when you send out money to own, lease or repair it, your cell phone when you make a payment.

Think about the others your payments benefit. You are keeping people employed. You are putting food on someone else’s table. You are sending money that will allow the institutions to provide services for others.

Be conscious about where you circulate your money. Do you want to make purchases in chain stores you’ve heard negative things about, like ones that support sweat shops, or would you rather support local independent businesses?

Choose better thoughts and better ways to send your money out into the Universe. Eliminate the word “spend” from your vocabulary. Instead, circulate and be on the lookout for all the surprising ways it will come back to you!

Where is your attention?

“Keep your attention on your intention.”

Last Wednesday, a neighbor jumped onto the elevator looking like a kid who just spent the day with Santa Claus.

“Did you see them?!” she asked excitedly. Not recognizing her qualifier provided my first clue that my answer was going to be no.

“The dolphins!” she clarified. “They’ve been out there the past two hours!” I looked at the time on my phone to see I’d left the beach exactly two hours prior, just as it started to get crowded. I ran upstairs for my bike and took a ride along the boardwalk, but I could sense I’d missed them. As someone who passionately adores these creatures, I dove straight into the seas of disappointment.

On Thursday, I went out to the beach a bit later, hoping my soulfriends of the sea were still in town. They were! But this time, I went out too late. Another neighbor came running over to tell me all about a visit so exciting, she Skyped her mother in Poland so she could watch the show.

Now I was downright miserable. Someone in Poland had seen dolphins swimming in my backyard, but I had somehow once again missed them? I asked my neighbor if they’d be back, as if she is an authority on dolphins. “Maybe!” she encouraged. But I knew better.

That night, uncharacteristically cranky, I began to tell friends I was dining with my lack based story. As the thoughts came spilling out of my mouth, I finally heard them. What was I thinking? This was what I used to do with my story of money, or lack thereof: tell anyone who would listen about the bills I couldn’t pay, the debt I was suffocating in. It wasn’t until I learned to stop focusing on “what was” that I was able to turn my monetary life around and begin creating “what could be.”

Fascinatingly, now that I’m in a place where the financial area of my life is starting to feel good to dwell upon, it’s rare anyone will hear a peep about it. It wasn’t until I dined with my friends that night that I even realized this. I was so conditioned to focus on “what’s wrong,” on lack, on so-called problems…it took much effort for me to change that programming, to give up complaining and take up visualizing, to make gratitude a daily practice.

Now it’s time to express that gratitude out loud! This is such a foreign concept though. When was the last time a friend called you and said, “You know what, I’m feeling really good about money today. Actually, I’m feeling downright abundant!”

We have been trained to focus on scarcity, and when we experience prosperity, we may not even notice or take it for granted. Most of us aren’t shouting it from the rooftops; that is seen as bragging. The last thing we want to do is tell a friend who is experiencing lack that we are not only getting by today but also starting to thrive. Yet in truth, talking about prosperity, our good health, harmonizing relationships etc. can be helpful to others! It shows what is possible. The real message when someone you know experiences something you want is that it’s available for you also; it’s up to you whether to repel it with jealousy or embrace it by celebrating with them.

Years ago, before I knew better, I got consumed with the green eyed monster whenever someone took a trip somewhere warm and sunny during the winter, and I was “stuck” in New York. I had no understanding that I was only stuck because of my own limiting thoughts and beliefs! Even once I learned about the law of attraction, it took some work to transcend the old habitual reaction. Then one day, I saw a friend’s photos from Puerto Rico on Facebook and I celebrated like crazy for him. “Wow, look at those beautiful palm trees!” I thought. “I’m so glad he’s getting to experience that right now! I can almost feel the sun on my own face!”

A week later, I was asked to take my very first trip with a client. A five-star, all expenses paid trip to…you guessed it: Puerto Rico!  As I posted photos of the beautiful beaches and rain forests, friends reacted in different ways. I knew exactly which friends would soon be taking tropical trips; one even went to Puerto Rico.

As many of you have already read, this past New Year’s Eve, I wrote a list of goals for the year. Topping my requests to the universe was swimming with dolphins in the wild, something I’d always wanted to do but never took seriously as a goal. It had always been a “yeah someday I’d love to…” sort of thing. When we put the message of “yeah someday” out there, our desires will always remain out of reach. After watching Dolphin Tale with a client, I decided to turn “yeah someday” into something more specific, letting the universe know I meant business. “Swim with dolphins in the wild by February.” 

A week or so later, a close friend told me he was taking an all expenses paid trip to Hawaii. By this point, I had learned to be happy for people just to be happy for them, not as a means to attract my own experiences. Perhaps this is why it only took a day or two to receive my very own trip to Hawaii, as I was asked to take a client to a treatment center in Kona.

The first thing I learned about Kona is that its seas host an abundance of dolphins; there is an entire industry based on swimming with them. I was amazed and overjoyed by how quickly my request came to fruition, in Hawaii of all places!

Reflecting upon this memory, I realized the dolphins had come to Long Beach with some powerful messages for me, starting with a reminder to set intentions for what I want. Sure, I’ve been quite appreciative of all that has transpired in my career the past few months, but I have spent little time thinking about what I want next. I haven’t created a list of goals since New Year’s Eve. It’s time!

The dolphins also reminded me to not only set my sights on what I want but also to keep my focus there…never give in to the temptation to talk about “what is” unless I want more of it. I hadn’t “missed” them; I’d simply been put on notice that there were in town! The only thing preventing me from seeing them was my scarcity thinking!

The next morning, I called a friend and left a message about how excited I was to see dolphins in Long Beach. Then I sat on my terrace and wrote about how wonderful an experience it was, putting it in the past tense, as if it had already occurred. As I detailed the delight on the faces of children on the beach, I looked at the ocean and saw two fins. No way! That was fast!

I grabbed my keys and a beach pass and flew downstairs. When I got down to the sand, I looked to the next break where I estimated they would be. All I saw was two surfers. “Nice hallucination,” I laughed.

Just as I was about to head back in, they surfaced again, in the exact spot I’d seen them in. I was tempted to run back up and get my surfboard so I could paddle out to them, but realized this what I’d asked for…I needed to just be present and enjoy the sight of them.  I’d swim with them another day, preferably somewhere with crystal blue pristine waters.

As I watched kids and adults alike point to the dolphins with excitement, just as they had in my visualization, I celebrated for each and every one of them.

Contagious Optimism!

“Faith and optimism are contagious.” ~Thom S. Rainer

On Tuesday night, the US gymnastics team cocreated the gold medal, as I suspected they would when I observed these “women” during the qualifying round. It wasn’t anything I could put my finger on; the collective just had that nameless quality that makes teams champions, each member exuding positive energy and exhibiting that sense of pending magic. The cusp of dream actualization was written across each of their faces, before the twist that brought a parade of tears to one of them. Team USA’s chances seemed to plummet when favorite Jordyn Weiber failed to qualify for the all-around. Would this consuming disappointment affect how she, and consequently her team, would perform on Tuesday?

The biggest individual story of Tuesday night was Jordyn’s rise from the ashes of her crushed all-around dream. Even before she set the stage with her vault, the first performance for Team USA, it was clear she had released the energy of regret, her smile and attitude setting the tone for her teammates. After Jordan, each gymnast built upon the inspiration and success of her predecessor; each delivered an even stronger vault. The confidence parlayed into subsequent events.

“It was contagious,” Gabby Douglas told the media.

Positive vibrations generally are. This is why I am so honored to be part of an uplifting book series called Contagious Optimism!, based on  what founder David Mezzapelle describes as “positive forward thinking.” Each volume is a collection of stories on specific topics, written for people who are going through various challenges, by those who have been there and can help them see the gift within, the silver lining, the light at the end of the tunnel.  Most importantly, the series offers what those US girls were oozing with on Tuesday night: hope and faith.

I knew this was right up my alley when a friend introduced me to David and Contagious Optimism! this past autumn but the project, and my involvement, has taken on a life of its own lately. Besides my original contributions to Volume Two, I am now going to put together a chapter on addiction recovery and  help create the Contagious Column, which I will detail when it’s up and running on the site. I couldn’t be more excited, because this series is in complete alignment with my beliefs, values and dreams! And having now met David in person, I have no doubt Contagious Optimism will be epic!

To add to my ever-growing sense of excitement, I was selected as August’s “Featured Co-Author.” Please check out the page at http://www.lifecarrots.com/Co-Author-Spotlight.html and peruse the site to learn more about Contagious Optimism!, sign up for the inspirational “life carrot of the day” and find out how you can contribute to future volumes!

The other reason I have not been present here on Time For Prosperity as much as I’d like to be, (well, besides the fact that it’s summer and I have been on a mission to spend every moment I can with family, friends, the ocean or my pool) is that I’ve been putting the finishing touches on my manuscript, the first book I have written on my own. I currently have friends reading some of the completed portions and their encouragement and feedback has made me all the more enthused. Talk about contagious optimism!  

Factor in my coaching clients, and you have a complete picture of why I’ve been MIA on here lately!  I have several stories in my mind, just waiting to be told, and I will return soon to deliver them…a rainy day might speed up that process. : )

For now, I leave you with this thought: What can you do today to spread faith and optimism? Be a carrier!

True Freedom

I know but one freedom and that is the freedom of the mind.”  

~Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Last week, we celebrated the Fourth of July or “Independence Day” here in the States. As the summer worshipper that I am, this has always been a favorite holiday, featuring beaches, barbeques, family, friends, fireworks and all things summer.

With all due respect to those who celebrate it for the “right” reasons, there is a lot more to freedom than what was awarded by our forefathers. I greatly appreciate the freedoms I have, living in a county where I can say, do and be what I want. But we can never be truly free as long as we are imprisoned by the fear, judgment, blame and worry that are so habitual to our small minds.  

With all the external freedoms many of us take for granted in the United States, so few of us have learned what it means to be internally free. True freedom is living in the moment, with no regret for any moment past or concern for one yet to come. It is the understanding that all beings are free to choose what they say and do, and the choice not to take any of it personally. Freedom is the ability to be happy and serene regardless of what anyone else is doing or feeling. It involves understanding that everything is occurring for our highest good, even when it doesn’t seem to be, and reaching for gratitude in all situations.

None of us are free as long as we are under rule of our egos. Not only doesn’t that feel good, it also blocks greater good from flowing into our lives. From a prosperity standpoint, this understanding is paramount. We are not a match to what we want when we are vehemently focused on and condemning what we don’t.

Two years ago, I was sharing a long-term sober companion job with someone I worked effortlessly with. We were a natural team, always there to support one another, one of us always able to cover a shift the other couldn’t work. After several months, we both began to burn out and a third was brought onto the scene. Without going into unnecessary details, the first coach and I were soon told by the company which referred the client that we were no longer needed on this job, which had two weeks left on the contract.

At the time, I was livid. I knew this woman was not doing things in a professional manner, and that she had no allegiance to us, the company that referred the client or the client herself.  A short time later, the company figured this out, but that is neither here nor there to anyone but my ego, who wanted to scream, “I told you so!!!”

When we were replaced, I went directly into scarcity thinking. I could not see that life had a better plan for me, so I festered in my fear and the perceived unfairness of it all. I was frustrated with this woman I was able to see through so quickly, the company she eventually blindsided and even the client. It took time for me to rebound energetically, and I was not a match to any other work during that stretch.  

Fast forward two years. I was working with another client in Manhattan, a job I shared with one other coach. We’d been working with this client for a month and I was starting to put in more time than I wanted to, since the other coach was going through a personal challenge. I don’t mind long-term jobs most of the year, but I prefer short ones in the summer, with time in between to relax and enjoy life. And while I have always found Manhattan quite magical in small doses, it wears on me when the days pile up, especially this time of year. Summers are for beaches! I wanted to inhale more salty sea air, less car fumes and cigarette smoke. I wanted to hear the lullaby of the ocean, less horns and sirens.

This job was through a company I don’t usually work with, and I was racking up expenses they are not accustomed to. Unlike my private work, or the company I am used to dealing with, they do not charge the clients for most expenses. Unbeknownst to me at the time, whenever I stayed at a hotel or went out to dinner, they took a hit on their profits. This company operates out of a part of the country where things are done differently, and the man who runs it sometimes takes on clients with no profit at all for himself in trying to help as many people as possible. Very respectable…and not at all what I’m used to in this industry.

The company asked if I minded sitting out a week so they could introduce someone from Philadelphia, who was being brought in as a “back-up” in case the woman I’d been sharing the job with needed to take more time off.  

Instead of reacting egoically as I had two years ago, I trusted that this would work out for the highest good of all involved. I welcomed the break. The next day, instead of trekking back into the city, I spent a gorgeous summer night outdoors at an amazing Beach Boys show. My mailman moved us up to incredible seats and it was such a delight to watch my mom and aunt dancing and singing all night. I laughed to realize this group was the reason I became so obsessed with summer, the beach and surfing; I’d been forcefed a steady dose of Endless Summer at the very impressionable age of four. If their songs had been about Manhattan, I’d probably live there.

The following day, I learned my brother was taking his twin seven-year-old boys to a hockey clinic taught by an old friend and mentor Adam Graves. My soul smiled at the prospect of seeing Adam for the first time since we’d both retired from the NHL, him as a player, me as a writer. I couldn’t wait to watch him instructing the boys.

I smiled at how  perfectly timed this break with the client was, and while I suspected it could turn into a permanent one, I knew that my potential ousting would only be due to the higher rate and expenses I command. I also realized this is not a bad thing. I’m of service enough in my personal life to feel good about charging high fees in my professional one, something I used to find next to impossible to do.

Monetarily, I trusted any income “lost” that week would be “found” elsewhere. As long as I remained in the spirit of trust and prosperity, this was guaranteed by universal law. So I went to the show and the hockey clinic and enjoyed every second of both events. It was at the latter that I received a call, informing me a former client relapsed after a year and a half of sobriety, asking me to work with her for a few days while she regained her footing.

Had the first company not asked me to sit out, I would not have been available for a job that suited me so much better on every level. I knew I was exactly where I was meant to be, working with someone who wanted my help, always a big plus in this line of work. 

At night, as I sat in the family’s expansive backyard, inhaling the fresh air and summer aromas, watching lighting bugs dance through the sky, I realized what a difference my attitude had made.

Anytime we fight the “what is” in life, we cut off our freedom.  But when we trust that everything is truly working for our highest good, we allow that to be so.

Admittedly, I felt a short pang of doubt when I learned the job with the city client was being handed over to the third coach.  I explored my thoughts and feelings, reframed them, and arrived back at trust within the same hour, something which had taken weeks to do two years ago. I knew life had another opportunity in store for me.

Even I was amazed to learn what it was. As I was completing this story, I got a call from the very client from two summers ago! She asked me to work with her privately once a week for coaching, meditation, yoga and exploring spiritual and creative outlets. Helping someone create a balanced mind-body-spirit approach to healing is my very favorite type of work, and this is a client I already adore, who has a much stronger base of sobriety than she did two years ago.  

I’m heading into that magical in small doses city to see her now.

Today’s Prosperity Process (repost)

“Most people feel a stark difference between the things they want to do and the things they believe they have to do. And most have put anything that earns money in the category of the things I  to do. There is no better way to earn money than to do the things you love to do.”

~Abraham-Hicks from the book “Money and the Law of Attraction”

As I’ve mentioned in recent posts, I’ve been working with a local client for the past three months. As our contract was coming to a close, I encouraged Paul, the interventionist who referred this client, to speak with his parents about an extension. The client was contending with a plethora of stressors and wanted to continue working with me.

His parents offered us significantly less than our original fee to extend. I agreed, as we were already working together less intensively than we had been when he first got out of treatment, and in my mind, I was being overpaid dramatically.

The next day, Paul texted to communicate he himself was hesitant about accepting the extension. The old, scarcity-based version of me would have panicked about “losing” the money. The old, codependently-based version would have freaked out about the idea of “abandoning” my client when he “needed me.”

The here and now version, however, knew to trust that this situation would work out for the highest good of all involved. I trusted Paul was making the exact right decision for himself by following his instincts. I trusted my client would be supported in whatever way would be best for him. I trusted life to continue delivering my flow of prosperity, and lead me to whatever opportunities would best serve me.

A few hours later, Paul called to discuss the situation, explaining his hesitation to be involved with the extension. He is happier, and more comfortable, working with short-term clients, with his preference being interventions, transports to and from treatment centers and short-term sober coaching. Longer term clients take his attention away from what he does best, and what he loves to do.

In the year since his partner, John, made his physical transition, I’ve incorrectly assumed we have had less long-term work because he wasn’t as good at the marketing end of things as John has been. Who knew this was simply a matter of preference? It’s amazing the stories we tell ourselves, and others, when we really don’t have the facts.  I was so glad to learn the truth.

Instead of trying to talk him into the extension, which I may have done in the past, I asked how he felt about the idea of me working with the client privately. Not only did he give his blessing, but he also called my client’s parents to encourage this arrangement.

They agreed, since I have been the one meeting with and supporting this client anyway. They did not even attempt to lower the fee, so I will be making Paul’s percentage as well as my own, bringing the total close to what I’d been making in the first place. Suddenly, I felt quite deserving of that.

The fact that Paul was willing to walk away from the money, which he was doing even less to make than I was, truly amazed me. He has been studying the same universal principles I have these past few years, and I was utterly amazed by his progress.  I was also impressed by his decision to pull out of a situation that didn’t feel right to him.

I sent him an email that night to express how much he’d inspired me. I told him the money he said “No thank you” to would come back to him, and then some, in a manner he felt better aligned with.

Two days later, a woman whose children I’d once tutored for the SAT contacted me to ask if I knew the name of an interventionist. My ego cried, “Tell her you can do it! You know how to do interventions! She won’t care that you’re not certified! You know her whole family! They already trust you! Cha ching!”

My spirit gave her Paul’s name.

He made the money we would have shared working with my client and then some, doing what he does best. Most importantly, an amazing kid I used to tutor is now getting the help he needs in rehab.

When we learn to trust in abundance, and say no thank you to the opportunities that don’t feel right, life is happy to deliver those that do. Bonus points: we receive even more money than we would have if we’d ignored our instincts and pushed ourselves to do something we didn’t want to.

Today’s Prosperity Process:

Explore the areas in your life where you tend to say yes when the situation doesn’t feel quite right.

What opportunities do you take to make money that you do not feel aligned with?

In what situations have you said no to a situation that didn’t feel right, and been rewarded with something better?

Are you ready to take a bold step in welcoming prosperity? If so, share insights related to today’s post by clicking “leave a reply” below!

What’s Your Sign?

On our prosperous journeys, there are always signs to let us know we are heading in the right direction. When we are open enough to notice them, these signs can have a profound effect on our senses of purpose and trust. They come in countless ways from an amalgamation of sources; some are one-time markers while others show up repeatedly.

Lilies are my personal favorite.

Five years ago, while attending training at iPEC coaching in Los Angeles, I began to smell these flowers, a scent that still vividly reminded me of my father’s passing almost 11 years earlier. Due to the association, it was a smell that sickened me; it literally made me gag. I didn’t stop to question why these flowers had appeared in our classroom, a conference room in a wonderful West Hollywood hotel, during our lunch break. I simply approached one of my teachers to ask if I could place them outside the room.

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Intentional Attention

“What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow.” ~Buddha

On May 1, I began my third month working with a local client, a situation which had seemed so ideal when it began in March. Prior to that, I had been traveling and working with clients intensively. I welcomed the opportunity to stay home, recharge, and be of service to someone right here in my very own community.

For two months, that felt just right. Heading into my third month, I began to sense a feeling of restlessness. I realized I missed traveling and escorting clients to treatment centers and the accompanying adventures that generally ensued.

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BluePrint Cleanse

 

“Ninety percent of the diseases known to man are caused by cheap foodstuffs. You are what you eat.” ~Victor Lindlahr (1923)

Nutrition plays a vital role in maintaining a high vibration and connecting more easily with intuitive guidance. My first juice cleanse was a great teacher on this topic, which prior to last week I only understood in theory.

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The Gift of Yes

“Happiness does not have to be created; it is our true nature.” ~Michael Bernard Beckwith

From a young age, most of us are taught that the key to happiness is to obtain and experience certain things outside of ourselves. We think we will be happy as soon as we have the perfect career, find the right relationship, look a certain way or make more money. If we succeed in attracting these desires, doing so may bring a fleeting degree of what feels like happiness. This illusory sense of joy fades the moment we inevitably begin to take this new experience for granted, begin to find fault with it or both. Lasting happiness cannot come by external means, because it is a quality that is already within us.

The most fascinating part is that when we learn to tap into happiness and other qualities within us, such as love, harmony, prosperity, creativity, perfect health and peace, we easily attract the things we want. We become vibrational matches to our desires, and cooperative components show up to bring them forth. Since we are no longer relying on externals to feel a certain way, we can enjoy our creations without concern for when they might not be with us. We release our clutches and simply appreciate. As we immerse ourselves in the vibration of fearless appreciation, more wonderful gifts can arrive that we can’t even yet imagine.

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